{"id":5773,"date":"2016-03-08T13:57:39","date_gmt":"2016-03-08T08:27:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=5773"},"modified":"2016-03-08T13:57:39","modified_gmt":"2016-03-08T08:27:39","slug":"dupatta-indispensable-accessory-indian-woman","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=5773","title":{"rendered":"Why the Dupatta is an Indispensable Accessory For Every Indian Woman"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<span class=\"dropcap\">O<\/span>ne of the ways that Indians attempt to understand themselves is through Hindi cinema. It seeps into our everyday lives in the form of dialogues that we turn to when we\u2019re at a loss for comebacks, and sometimes, in the form of songs we turn to that get us in a way that people rarely do. Recently, when I asked the women around me about their relationship with dupattas \u2013 a traditional scarf that is used to accessorise suits and tunics \u2013 they embellished their stories with links to different songs about dupattas. From \u201cLal Dupatta\u201d to \u201cDupatta Tera Nau Rang Da,\u201d the ubiquitous dupatta has travelled across time and space.\n\nMy own fascination with dupattas had similar origins. Although, I often found myself confused about the purpose of dupattas: In my everyday life, I would see <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/gender\/why-every-woman-needs-a-house-of-her-own\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">women<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> around me use it as a garment of honour \u2013 a long, impractical, baggy piece of cloth that women used to cover their breasts because men couldn\u2019t keep their eyeballs to themselves. In movies however, the dupatta was a garment of desire. In the filmi universe, this very piece of cloth found itself entangled in a potential partner\u2019s cuff or it found itself fluttering against the wind whenever you were consumed with desire. In Hindi cinema then, this dupatta was a metaphor for the exact freedom that the everyday dupatta seemed to deny. It was in this friction of being embroiled between honour and desire that the dupatta became a subject of inquiry for me. I wanted to know, why were women wearing dupattas and were they too attached to the dupatta to let go of it?\n\nTake me for instance. I had grown up with romanticising the dupatta. But gradually as I came-of-age, like the women around me, I somehow grew distanced from it. Even though our wardrobes were a balanced mix of kurtis, suits, crop tops, and skirts, the dupatta seemed to be buried away in a corner. It became a garment that meant too much and too little at the same time. It meant too much because it carried a deep nostalgic sentiment. Some of the dupattas we owned were inherited and there was no way one could have discarded them. It meant too little because often, we didn\u2019t know what to do with them.\n\nBut as I began to look carefully, I noticed a special feature of the dupatta: its indispensability. It is perhaps the rare item of clothing that has encompassed every facet of a woman\u2019s life. I soon noticed how the dupatta had moved on from being attire to being an object of utility that was being used in myriad ways. When I moved to Delhi for college, the dupatta went from being used for aesthetics \u2013 the women in <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/politics\/india-abvp-delhi-university-jnu-maneka-gandhi-ramjas-college-afzal-guru-jamia-millia-islamia\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Delhi University<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> draped their dupattas with their opinionated politics \u2013 to being used as an escape. The girls in my hostel would get together to piece a range of dupattas together and turn it to a rope to climb out of the balcony. The garment suddenly became synonymous with rebellion \u2013 against curfew timings. It was how we took to the streets whether it was to protest or to grab drinks at a bar.\n\n<blockquote class=\"quote--center\"><p>I soon noticed how the dupatta had moved on from being attire to being an object of utility that was being used in myriad ways.<\/p><\/blockquote> \n\nThen there is the reliance on the dupatta during motherhood. I often find it difficult to settle the question of whether women consciously choose to be mothers or if they are conditioned into it. For my house help, Lakshmi Didi, being a working mother didn\u2019t mean she could leave motherhood behind. On more than one occasion, I remember her bringing her <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/modern-family\/kids-technology-parents\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">children<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> over when she would come to work at our house. Her friendly army of children included her newborn daughter who often lay in a hammock-like structure sculpted out of a dupatta. When I quizzed her about this, Lakshmi Didi said it served her in two ways: One, it gave her daughter the impression that she was swinging and wrapped in someone\u2019s arms and two, since the dupatta carried Lakshmi Didi\u2019s scent, her daughter was likely to think of her. For mothers all around the country, the dupatta was nothing short of a wingman.\n\nBut perhaps, my personal favourite way of using the dupatta remains its ability to be an accommodating <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/vice\/sex-toys-for-women-india-erotica\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sex toy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. I have had female friends confide in me about using it to sometimes blindfold their partners, and sometimes tie them to their beds. While for some, the dupatta had simply come to use in the heat of the moment, some of them had chosen to go ahead with the dupatta to avoid an expensive purchase. It\u2019s perhaps poetic that the dupatta was being used on men who tend to think that the fairer sex only turned to dupattas to conceal their bodies and their desires.\n\nIt\u2019s now been years since I first chanced upon a dupatta. As an adult woman, my <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/love-and-sex\/relationships-dating-advice-love-romance\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> with it is hinged on convenience. Today, I have made curtains, table-covers, and even cushion covers out of them. Each of these dupattas carry an anecdote, weighted with meaning: The curtain in my room marks my first escape from the curfew and the table cover in my living room is reminiscent of the first time one of us burnt an iron.\n\nIt\u2019s only recently that it hit me: The dupatta doesn\u2019t ask anything of you. In our journey through life as women, the dupatta has found a way to be a constant companion, sometimes in the background and sometimes walking into the foreground. To then, know what dupattas can do for women is to realise the sheer complexity of what it means to be a woman.\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The dupatta doesn\u2019t ask anything of you. In our journey through life as women, the dupatta has found a way to be a constant companion, sometimes as an escape, a wingman, or just as an expression of our desires.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":379,"featured_media":5774,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[170],"tags":[954,2349,9709,243,409,735],"class_list":["post-5773","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-gender","tag-daughter","tag-delhi-university","tag-dupatta","tag-mothers","tag-sex-toy","tag-women"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Why the Dupatta is an Indispensable Accessory For Every Indian Woman<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The dupatta doesn\u2019t ask anything of you. 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