{"id":5723,"date":"2016-05-06T21:00:14","date_gmt":"2016-05-06T15:30:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=5723"},"modified":"2026-07-17T21:49:21","modified_gmt":"2026-07-17T16:19:21","slug":"28-years-of-lamhe-anil-kapoor-viren-sridevi-yash-raj","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=5723","title":{"rendered":"28 Years of Lamhe: Bollywood Could Do with More Heroes Like Anil Kapoor\u2019s Viren"},"content":{"rendered":"\nW<\/span>hen you think about it, Yash Raj\u2019s cult classic Lamhe <\/em>(it turns 28 today) has a fairly creepy premise. Pluck it out of Bollywood\u2019s rosy context and place it in a cultural, everyday one and you can\u2019t help but see it. Imagine a guy that you had a vague, undefined relationship with. He\u2019s a friend<\/a>, but not quite \u2014 there\u2019s this unspoken romantic-cum-sexual awareness that ebbs and flows between you two. Oh come on, admit it, we all have that one friend, who could have been more, but wasn\u2019t, for some silly logistical reason or another. Maybe you were just never single at the same time. Maybe you moved cities, or he took too long to get over his cheating ex, and the chemistry eventually fizzled away, its once-upon-a-time-existence unacknowledged, but not unfelt. Yes, so that<\/em> guy. Now imagine your daughter<\/a> hooking up with him, like, one hot minute after she turns 18. In reality, most of us would gasp and shake our heads violently in disgust and disapprove of such a pairing. That\u2019s understandable. The thought of a woman\u2019s somewhat ex \u2014 no, it doesn\u2019t matter that they never actually did it \u2014 getting it on with her daughter is enough to make the most woke among us uncomfortable.\n\nAnd yet, the word and phrase you\u2019ll most often see sitting next to Lamhe<\/em> are \u201cbold\u201d and \u201cahead of its time\u201d; not \u201cscandalous\u201d, which is how most of us would describe such a relationship<\/a> in real life. For a long time now, I\u2019ve found this reel-real contradiction intriguing. And yet, I do believe Lamhe<\/em> is one of the best romantic films to come out of Bollywood.\n\n

\"lamhe_sridevi_anil_kapoor\"\n

\n

What made it unique was the man\u2019s intense internal struggle, self-flagellation, and multiple desperate efforts to not act on the impulse. <\/p>\n

Yash Raj Films<\/p>\n<\/figcaption>\n<\/figure>\n\nI\u2019m not sure why it\u2019s called ahead of its time \u2014 May-December romances, with older men pursuing women young enough to be their daughters, aren\u2019t exactly rare or shocking occurrences in Indian society. Young girls across the country are routinely forced into exactly such marriages<\/a>. Bollywood, especially, has been particularly accommodating of ageing men\u2019s romantic whims and inclinations. Dilip Kumar was 44 to Saira Banu\u2019s 22, when the two got married. Kabir Bedi has out-aged two of his four wives by two and three decades. Sanjay Dutt is 19 years older than wife Manyata Dutt. Anita Konwar is 26 years younger than husband Milind Soman<\/a>. And these are just couples where the man reached adulthood before his lady love was even born \u2014 there are plenty more with less shocking but significant age gaps.\n\nSo no, Lamhe<\/em> is not \u201cahead of its time\u201d for daring to show a salt-and-pepper Viren falling for a barely legal Pooja. What made it unique, to me at least, was the man\u2019s intense internal struggle, self-flagellation, and multiple desperate efforts to not act on the impulse. How often have we seen a hero who doesn\u2019t feel entitled to the affections of the woman his heart desires? We\u2019re used to seeing them stalk<\/a>, kidnap, harass\u2026 basically exhibit behaviour that would make most women run screaming in the woods to get away from them. But self-doubt and condemnation for their own questionable behaviour? Nope.\n\nWhat makes Lamhe<\/em> progressive and worthy of admiration even today, almost 30 years after its release, is not its love-conquers-all premise, but its treatment. Anil Kapoor\u2019s Viren mirrors our own queasiness with the morality of romancing his former love\u2019s daughter, even if one was to overlook the yawning age gap<\/a> between him and Sridevi\u2019s Pooja. So much so that he even commits to getting married just so that she\u2019d agree to a more age-appropriate match. We can see the shock and discomfort on his face the day he realises that Pooja has replaced Pallavi in his heart.\n\n

What makes Lamhe<\/i> progressive and worthy of admiration even today, is not its love-conquers-all premise, but its treatment.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\nMinus his palpable connection with his conscience, it would be hard to describe Viren as little more than a creepy old man with mildly paedophilic tendencies. Love is as much about what we stop ourselves from doing as it is about what we do, after all \u2014 a consideration that is often missing from Bollwyood\u2019s porky understanding of love.\n\nI wish the hesitation and restraint that Viren visibly grapples with were sentiments that had received a more regular airing within the annals of Bollywood. Given its opinion- shaping power and influence, maybe then we\u2019d have had a healthier culture for girls to grow into women in. One where they\u2019re not fair and acceptable game for men old enough to have fathered them. What would that world look like? One where women weren\u2019t constantly being bombarded with messages<\/a> that emphasised that their romantic value was vested in their age, that they couldn\u2019t take time to shake off their insecurities because what if they were too old for the one they were meant to be with by then?\n\n

\"lamhe_anil_kapoor_sridevi\"\n

\n

I wish the hesitation and restraint that Viren visibly grapples with were sentiments that had received a more regular airing within the annals of Bollywood.<\/p>\n

Yash Raj Films<\/p>\n<\/figcaption>\n<\/figure>\n\nI was all of 25 when I briefly dated a man 15 years my senior. It was a tumultuous relationship \u2014 I was often in over my head even though I didn\u2019t know it at the time. I wasn\u2019t old or experienced enough to know when I was being toyed with, or object in any meaningful way when I felt uneasy about the way I was being treated. It never once occurred to me to question what made a man closer to my parents<\/a>\u2019 age than my own court me with such confidence and cockiness. I never wondered why no one \u2014 not me, or his vast circle of friends \u2014 ever thought it inappropriate. At best, there were jokes that revolved around his mid-life crisis and ended with me being called his trophy (when they were being kind) or twinkie (when they were being cruel). But it was never wrong<\/em>, just funny.\n\nI\u2019m not vilifying relationships with major age gaps, not at all. The best \u2014 and worst \u2014 thing about love is that it has this unnerving ability to spring up like a toadstool, without warning or provocation, wherever it desires. I\u2019d be as acutely disappointed as the next person if Viren and Pooja hadn\u2019t eventually found their way to each other. Although, if I\u2019d had it my way, it would be after many more years had passed, when she wasn\u2019t still so<\/em> painfully young and had had the time to pursue dreams, and their romance<\/a> didn\u2019t still carry the unpleasant whiff of cradle-snatching, but that\u2019s just me. All I\u2019m saying is that maybe it\u2019s time we see restraint as an act of love just as much as we believe defiance to be. Lamhe<\/em> did that, and it did it with a tenderness that was unthinkable in the hot-headed \u201990s, a tender that is still rare and hard to come by, which is what gives it its timeless appeal.\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Yash Chopra\u2019s Lamhe is not \u201cahead of its time\u201d for daring to show a salt-and-pepper Viren falling for a barely legal Pooja. What makes it unique, to me at least, is the man\u2019s intense internal struggle, self-flagellation, and multiple desperate efforts to not act on the impulse. How often have we seen a hero who doesn\u2019t feel entitled to the affections of the woman his heart desires?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":306,"featured_media":5727,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3114],"tags":[140,9324,1466,1955,1837],"class_list":["post-5723","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-bollywood","tag-anil-kapoor","tag-lamhe","tag-romance","tag-sridevi","tag-yash-raj"],"yoast_head":"\n28 Years of Lamhe: Bollywood Could Do with More Heroes Like Anil Kapoor\u2019s Viren<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Yash Chopra\u2019s Lamhe is not \u201cahead of its time\u201d for daring to show a salt-and-pepper Viren falling for a barely legal Pooja. What makes it unique, to me at least, is the man\u2019s intense internal struggle, self-flagellation, and multiple desperate efforts to not act on the impulse. 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