{"id":4656,"date":"2016-07-23T16:15:58","date_gmt":"2016-07-23T10:45:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=4656"},"modified":"2016-07-23T16:15:58","modified_gmt":"2016-07-23T10:45:58","slug":"how-i-became-an-accidental-cat-dad-realised-im-not-cut-out-for-parenthood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=4656","title":{"rendered":"How I Became an Accidental Cat Dad & Realised I\u2019m Not Cut Out for Parenthood"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\u201cM<\/span>y <\/p>babies<\/span><\/a> are starving!\u201d My usual post-lunch daze was rudely interrupted by this singular thought \u2013 a thought that I, an unmarried 27-year-old, did not imagine would concern me for a few more years at least. But there I was, ducking out of office to drive back home in the afternoon heat, all to fulfil my self-appointed role as the caretaker of three very needy infants. And as I ran up the stairs to my apartment, my slippers slapping an urgent rhythm, I thanked my lucky stars that at least my dependents weren\u2019t human babies.<\/span>\n\nAbout three weeks ago, a mother cat <\/span>abandoned<\/span><\/a> her litter in my building\u2019s parking lot. There was an orange tabby, a tricoloured tortoiseshell, and a grey-and-white dappled kitten, their eyes barely open, emitting such high-pitched mews that I first thought the sounds were coming from birds. They were tiny, no more than a month old. The tortoiseshell, a female, was in the worst shape of the lot \u2013 she had a maggot infestation on her rear end, and a painfully distended belly that was likely full of worms.<\/span>\n\nAt first, my <\/span>girlfriend<\/span><\/a> and I thought to let nature run its course. But after the mother cat failed to show for two more days, and the kittens\u2019 mews became increasingly pitiful, we had to step in. We marched downstairs with an empty carton with windows cut in the sides, grabbed the sickly kitten, placed her snugly in the carton, wrapped in warm napkins, and took her to the vet. And that is how we became accidental cat parents.<\/span>\n\nI\u2019ve never kept a <\/span>pet<\/span><\/a>, so I was unprepared for the amount of work that would go into nursing Cleo back to health. (Yes, we named her Cleo, and her brothers are Sizzles and Cosmo.) For a precious little kitten that only weighed 300 gramme, I must have lost at least three kilos in running up and down the staircase to get her the right medicines and make sure she was eating on time. And holy meow, were there a lot of medicines indeed!<\/span>\n

I\u2019ve learned parenting isn\u2019t just about gushing about how cute your offspring (or pet) is, it takes dedicated effort and self-sacrifice.<\/blockquote>\nScavon anti-microbial cream. To be applied thrice a day to the wounded area to keep away the flies and those pesky maggots.<\/span>\n\nAmoxicillin syrup, twice a day. Only 0.2 ml however; too much will cause ulcers, too little might lead to infection.<\/span>\n\nAnd for all three of them \u2013 Bendex de-worming solution, first thing in the morning, for three days, to be repeated after a gap of ten days. Oh and to make it interesting, it has to be administered orally, with a syringe \u2013 something that causes kittens to flinch, much like questions about Canadian passports do to <\/span>Akshay Kumar<\/span><\/a>.<\/span>\n\nAs I was saying, I\u2019ve never kept a pet before this. I\u2019ve always loved <\/span>animals<\/span><\/a>, and to a lesser extent, babies too. So before we had the responsibility of caring for Cleo, Cosmo, and Sizzles, I used to (rather pompously) assume I was good parenting material, for babies of both the four-legged and two-legged varieties. The last few weeks have shown me I was living in a glass house all along. In the first week, I was calling them names like \u201ccuties\u201d and \u201cbabies\u201d in a tone sweeter than the one I wished my girlfriend a happy birthday this year. But of late, any <\/span>eavesdroppers<\/span><\/a> are more likely to hear me say something like \u201crascal\u201d or \u201charaami\u201d, which are just the printable names I have for them. Luckily, there\u2019s no danger of those three fuzzballs ever understanding what I\u2019ve been saying about them, which is not something that you can say for human children.<\/span>\n\nRaising pets has always been considered a dry run for parenting. A Huffpost article titled \u201cHow Your First Dog Can Better Prepare You for Parenthood\u201d <\/span>states<\/span><\/a> that couples who begin caring for young animals do so \u201cnot only as a step toward deepening their <\/span>commitment<\/span><\/a>, but also as a test of their ability to work together to nurture another living thing \u2013 a child, most importantly.\u201d But if this was a test, my own self-assessment would be that I failed. I wouldn\u2019t want to have kids based off this experience. Not for any lofty reasons like the planet\u2019s deteriorating climate or a lack of faith in the goodness of human nature, but just because raising kittens is hard.<\/span>\n\nEven without the hassle of <\/span>diapers<\/span><\/a> and bottles that human babies would entail, these kittens have taken me to my wits\u2019 end. Forget having to change a smelly diaper, I was complaining at simply having to clean Cleo\u2019s bum with a damp cloth before applying the medicinal cream. Their feeding cycle (every four hours) had me skipping workouts and going late to bed, and as I gave their wellbeing priority over mine, I realised I\u2019m way more selfish than I thought I was.<\/span>\n
I\u2019ve always loved animals, and to a lesser extent, babies too.<\/blockquote>\nI also realised I am super-paranoid, which was another fun discovery. I once ran downstairs at 2:50 am because I saw a feral tomcat enter the building compound. Worried he would claw the <\/span>kittens<\/span><\/a>, I rushed to where they were sleeping and stood guard, even though it was completely unnecessary \u2013 the tom ignored me as if he was a radar signal and I was a plane behind a cloud and continued his nightly patrol.<\/span>\n\nThe experience of making sure these abandoned kittens grow up into healthy cats has been a harrowing one, and I have a newfound respect for people who manage to raise little humans. I\u2019ve learned <\/span>parenting<\/span><\/a> isn\u2019t just about gushing about how cute your offspring (or pet) is, it takes dedicated effort and self-sacrifice. But before anyone classifies me as a bad, or lazy cat-parent, I want to make clear that these are not the reasons (or not the prime one, at least) that the kittens taught me I wasn\u2019t ready to have kids.<\/span>\n\nThe real reason I\u2019m afraid of having kids after these kittens isn\u2019t something I\u2019ve already experienced, but something that is still to come to pass. Cleo, Cosmo, and Sizzles aren\u2019t going to be this size forever, and as they grow up, they\u2019re already acquiring more of that famous feline aloofness. They no longer sit on my feet after feeding, choosing to slink off to a more secluded spot under a car or behind a <\/span>flower pot<\/span><\/a>. The day where I call to them and they ignore me, just like that tomcat did is not too far off, and when it comes, my life is going to feel a little emptier. As I\u2019ve learned through conversations with my own parents, the hardest part about raising a child is letting go. Eventually, I have to let go of these kittens, and it\u2019s going to hurt me much more than it\u2019s going to hurt them.<\/span>\n\nThat\u2019s why I\u2019m not ready to have kids. Because when it comes to parenting, there\u2019s so much to learn, and I still haven\u2019t figured out how to say <\/span>goodbye<\/span><\/a>.<\/span>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

About three weeks ago, a mother cat abandoned her litter in my building\u2019s parking lot. Even without the hassle of diapers and bottles that human babies would entail, these kittens have taken me to my wits\u2019 end.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":43,"featured_media":4657,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[107],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4656","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-pov"],"yoast_head":"\nHow I Became an Accidental Cat Dad & Realised I\u2019m Not Cut Out for Parenthood<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"About three weeks ago, a mother cat abandoned her litter in my building\u2019s parking lot. 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