{"id":4581,"date":"2016-07-08T19:11:02","date_gmt":"2016-07-08T13:41:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=4581"},"modified":"2016-07-08T19:11:02","modified_gmt":"2016-07-08T13:41:02","slug":"why-the-insipid-you-can-never-match-the-intimacy-of-hindi-pronouns","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=4581","title":{"rendered":"Hum, Tum, Aur Aap: Why the Insipid \u201cYou\u201d Can Never Match the Intimacy of Hindi Pronouns"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><span class=\"dropcap\">A<\/span>couple of days ago, someone on my timeline tweeted about a dozen variations that the Hindi language has for the word \u201cslap\u201d. From the more sophisticated \u201cthappad\u201d, the <\/p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/humour\/mumbaiyya-hindi-north-india-delhi\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Bambaiyya<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u201ckaan ke neeche\u201d to the rather rustic \u201cjhapad\u201d and Eastern UP\u2019s \u00a0very own \u201ckantap\u201d, it was an exhaustive, instructive list. What followed was a surreal commentary on the state of affairs in our country. The thread soon turned into an admiration club that declared Hindi as the \u201cbestestest language in the world\u201d simply because it offered such variety when it came to getting beaten up. And as things on social media pan out these days, it devolved in no time into Twitter\u2019s version of the cat fight \u2013 people quarrelled over whose regional terminology for the slap was better.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Besides the disturbingly low level of discourse, the thread was a reminder of an essential truth: Hindi is not a single <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/social-commentary\/un-english-language-day-mother-tongue\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">language<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. As ubiquitous as it is, Hindi has always had a staggering ability to adapt and evolve across cultural and geographical boundaries, and reflect the diversity of our strange, insane country in ways only it can. <\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I am a native Hindi speaker who belongs to what the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/humour\/mumbai-general-election-2019-vote-congress-bjp\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">election season<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> coverage frequently refers to as \u201cthe Hindi belt\u201d of the country. According to the newspapers, we\u2019re also the \u201ccow belt\u201d. The image that these monikers convey is that of a homogeneous landmass, populated by people who speak the same language and nurture a strange obsession for the bovines in their backyard. Although, in reality, the \u201cHindi belt\u201d is a complicated hybrid of several states, cultures, and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/pop-culture\/memes-language-millennial-internet\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">dialects<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. <\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Hindi may seem like our one unifying thread. Yet it is anything but. In fact, our cows for all their inadvertent divisiveness, are a whole lot more alike than the way we speak. What is \u201cjhakaas\u201d in <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/humour\/mumbai-city-of-dreams-firang-friend\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mumbai<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> morphs into something that is \u201cbhaukal\u201d\u2019 in Lucknow. And even though both words sound like they can mean nothing good, they embody as effusive a praise as is possible in their respective regions. <\/span>\n<blockquote class=\"quote--center\">\u201cTu\u201d in Delhi sounds wholly different from a \u201ctu\u201d in Mumbai in ways that is hard to exactly pinpoint, but makes perfect sense.<\/blockquote>\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">People seeped in the homogeneity of <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/people\/widowed-by-english\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">English<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and its pervading usage of \u201cyou\u201d may rarely notice the gravitas that pronouns can lend to a language. And in Hindi, pronouns define more than people: They define regions, cultures, levels of civility, and even intimacy.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cI wonder why he always calls me \u2018tum\u2019. It feels like my husband is talking to me,\u201d a friend whined about a male <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/social-commentary\/feeling-jealous-envy-friends-instagram-post-deepveer-nickyanka\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">batchmate<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> when we were still freshers in law school. The batchmate in question, was from Bhopal, and his default pronoun, in true Bhopali ways, was \u201ctum\u201d. Her bewilderment while hilarious, wasn\u2019t misplaced. She was from Delhi, the city where \u201ctum\u201d is an alien word that belongs to old-school Hindi movies and strictly formal settings. <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/humour\/delhi-smog-odd-even-pollution-air-quality-index-beijing-haze\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dilliwalas<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, with their borrowed Haryanvi ruggedness, are hard pressed to slip into \u201ctu\u201d \u2013 their idea of intimate friendliness and casual conversations. So over the years, I learnt to segregate regions based on how they employ their \u201ctum\u201d and \u201caap\u201d&#8217;. \u201cTu\u201d in Delhi sounds wholly different from a \u201ctu\u201d in Mumbai in ways that is hard to exactly pinpoint, but makes perfect sense. In Madhya Pradesh \u201ctum\u201d has a warmth that is very different from Rajasthan. The pronouns of the Rajasthani folk always carry the weight of their specific dialect. <\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While we Hindi bashi take pride in our pronouns, for non-native Hindi speakers, pronouns are the nemesis. Even then they serve as a proof of identity. The gender confusion <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/satire\/moon-moon-sen-is-every-bengali-without-bed-tea\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Bengalis<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> tend to have is absolutely unique as is the peculiar sharpness of \u201ctu\u201d among Marathi speakers. The latter has always made my mother wonder if Maharashtrians are always in the mood to pick a fight.\u00a0The broken South Indian take on Hindi may not seem too nuanced, but my rendezvous with Hyderabad introduced me to a version immortalised by the legendary Mehmood. It was a version that I stumbled upon when I interacted with autowallahs in Hyderabad and realised that \u201cTumhi jaata hai\u201d, was a legitimate Hindi sentence in at least one part of this country.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">My fascination with these various \u201cHindis\u201d is rooted in personal angst. I was born in MP, in the same town as Phoolan Devi and inherited the Bundelkhandi lilt from my <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/modern-family\/spain-india-divorce-motherhood-mother\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mother<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u2019s side of the family. I spent my childhood in the hills and for the longest time, \u201cYou sound like a Pahadi\u201d, was a constant refrain. Then we moved homes, and I found myself in Uttar Pradesh, and a state of confusion followed: I became a UPite who did not sound like anyone from UP. <\/span>\n<blockquote class=\"quote--center\">Instead, my linguistic identity was shaped by the words that felt like home.<\/blockquote>\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Over the years, my pronunciations evolved. My Hindi had a strange mix of UP\u2019s lazy drawl, Bundelkhand\u2019s sharp tone, and an uptight throw that was a trademark of Pahadi Khadi Boli.\u00a0It was distressing, because my confounding linguistic identity meant that I didn\u2019t belong anywhere. Irrespective of where I went, I didn\u2019t sound like them. <\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It didn\u2019t help that I didn\u2019t know how to commit to Hindi, having always failed to find a facet of my own <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/social-commentary\/mother-language-day-gujarati-english-millennials\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mother tongue<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that I could truly call my own. \u201cHow many of you are coming,\u201d a friend half-jokingly asked once when I accidentally slipped into the age-old Lakhnawi habit and referred to myself as \u201chum\u201d\u2013 a plural pronoun in most parts of the country. It wasn\u2019t the first time someone had joked about my usage of the word instead of the straightforward \u201cmain\u201d. But my \u201chum\u201d borrows the same grandeur that translates into Lakhnawai tehzeeb or politeness where even an abuse is accompanied by a rather respectful \u201caap\u201d.\u00a0<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Over the years, my time away from <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/social-commentary\/lucknow-muslim-city-diversity\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lucknow<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> helped me arrive at a place that eased some of my confusion: I realised that my identity wasn\u2019t something that I needed to decipher in words that weren\u2019t my own. Instead, my linguistic identity was shaped by the words that felt like home. And what made me feel home was the comfort of slipping into \u201chum\u201d and the warmth of our faux Nawabi legacy. My language didn\u2019t need to blend in, it just had to find me. <\/span>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>People seeped in the homogeneity of English and its pervading usage of \u201cyou\u201d may rarely notice the gravitas that pronouns can lend to a language. But in Hindi, pronouns define more than people: They define regions, cultures, levels of civility, and even intimacy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":212,"featured_media":4582,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3452],"tags":[8118,8119,4679,334,8120,995,3090,4164,8121,1228,3937,80,8122,8123,8124],"class_list":["post-4581","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-culture","tag-accent","tag-bhopal","tag-cultures","tag-delhi","tag-dialects","tag-hindi","tag-hyderabad","tag-identity","tag-languages","tag-lucknow","tag-marathi","tag-mumbai","tag-nawabi","tag-pahadi-khadi-boli","tag-pronouns"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Hum, Tum, Aur Aap: Why the Insipid \u201cYou\u201d Can Never Match the Intimacy of Hindi Pronouns<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"People seeped in the homogeneity of English and its pervading usage of \u201cyou\u201d may rarely notice the gravitas that pronouns can lend to a language. But in Hindi, pronouns define more than people: They define regions, cultures, levels of civility, and even intimacy.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/?p=4581\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Hum, Tum, Aur Aap: Why the Insipid \u201cYou\u201d Can Never Match the Intimacy of Hindi Pronouns\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"People seeped in the homogeneity of English and its pervading usage of \u201cyou\u201d may rarely notice the gravitas that pronouns can lend to a language. But in Hindi, pronouns define more than people: They define regions, cultures, levels of civility, and even intimacy.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/?p=4581\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Arr\u00e9\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2016-07-08T13:41:02+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/1556800610.gif\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1520\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"850\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/gif\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Runjhun Noopur\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"Hum, Tum, Aur Aap: Why the Insipid \u201cYou\u201d Can Never Match the Intimacy of Hindi Pronouns\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:description\" content=\"People seeped in the homogeneity of English and its pervading usage of \u201cyou\u201d may rarely notice the gravitas that pronouns can lend to a language. 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