{"id":4531,"date":"2016-07-21T05:27:54","date_gmt":"2016-07-20T23:57:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=4531"},"modified":"2026-07-17T21:07:34","modified_gmt":"2026-07-17T15:37:34","slug":"fleabag-review-phoebe-waller-bridge-andrew-scott-female-coping","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=4531","title":{"rendered":"How Phoebe Waller-Bridge\u2019s Fleabag Taught Us the Art of Female Coping"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

F<\/span>or a long time, I was convinced that the act of coping had an eventual destination \u2013 that it was a temporary stopover between the heart processing the origins of<\/p> pain<\/span><\/a> and the mind co-existing with it. I anticipated its arrival every time my life descended into the kind of dysfunctionality that accompanied being summarily dismissed. And just like the heartbroken Fleabag whose future seemed devoid of promise following the violent loss of her best friend, I wouldn’t think twice before surrendering myself to a performance of coping during these bittersweet excursions. <\/span>\n\nSo when the eponymous anti-heroine broke the fourth wall in the opening moments of <\/span>Fleabag\u2019s<\/span><\/i> second season 371 days, 19 hours, and 26 minutes since we\u2019d last witnessed her cope with her grief, I was certain it\u2019d cut close to the bone. And it did. Like so many of us, Fleabag instinctively chose to cope with the world that had left her behind by willingly leaving herself behind. She dived headfirst into adopting an experimental nourishing routine: For the first time in her life, Fleabag worked out, embraced a healthy diet, and abstained from meaningless sex, even when it meant turning down a ridiculously gorgeous pickup\u2019s offer to go down on her. And Fleabag even performed a version of herself, succumbing to the assumption that coping is \u201covercoming\u201d \u2013 the sunset that would make way for sunrise. <\/span>\n\nIn that same episode, Claire, Fleabag\u2019s barely-held-together elder <\/span>sister<\/span><\/a>, scoffed at this ostentatious display of escapism, instead insisting that the only way to live is to \u201cface who you are and suffer the consequences\u201d. Yet even Claire\u2019s version doesn\u2019t veer very far away from Fleabag\u2019s coping mechanisms. Both exist on the premise that coping is a passage and not a lifelong condition. A way to detach your future from pain. For the belief has always been that, when coping ends, living starts. Except, like so many other women, Fleabag, Claire, and I were pressuring ourselves to heal, not cope. <\/span>\n

At its primal state, as Fleabag posits, female coping is an endless cycle of mutiny.<\/blockquote>\nIn those minutes, <\/span>Fleabag<\/span><\/i> translated something unimaginably intimate about the female condition. It probed the female mind that inadvertently confuses coping as overcoming. Over the years, pop-culture has bypassed the convoluted terrains of female pain by inaccurately capturing coping as a temporary \u201csuffering\u201d inevitable for survival. And it\u2019s this precise narrative of female coping that Waller-Bridge reclaims in the new season of <\/span>Fleabag<\/span><\/i>. Through the span of six piercing episodes, she demands the exact opposite: That female coping be regarded as survival that replenishes us for a lifetime of suffering. <\/span>\n\nFleabag<\/span><\/i> distills this singularity of female coping with a sensational <\/span>monologue<\/span><\/a> in its third episode. Over martinis at a bar, Bellinda (Kristin Scott Thomas), a 58-year-old lesbian businesswoman who Fleabag has befriended only minutes back, reminds her \u2013 and us \u2013 about the inescapable, cyclical nature of female suffering. \u201cWomen are born with pain built in. It\u2019s our physical destiny. Period pain, sore boobs, <\/span>childbirth<\/span><\/a>, you know. We carry it within ourselves throughout our lives,\u201d she argues, adding that men tend to \u201cseek it out\u201d by inventing gods, demons, and by creating wars so that they can feel things and touch each other. <\/span>\n\nThe only time a woman can exist just as a \u201cperson\u201d and not \u201ca machine with parts,\u201d Bellinda claims, is when she hits menopause. With that episode, Fleabag<\/span><\/i> at once, busts the myth that the world keeps force-feeding pained women all their lives: That the easiest way to have a semblance of control over our lives is to lock away our loss somewhere we can\u2019t access. To will ourselves to emerge unmoored from pain. <\/span>Yet, what the world forgets, and what <\/span>Fleabag<\/span><\/i> keenly underlines, is that women go through their entire lives without any control over their own bodies or their pain. It\u2019s why men can escape pain by healing but women are programmed to rage with it \u2013 their bodies can never forget or deflect pain. Female coping, then isn\u2019t a reaction but a continuous action. Loss doesn\u2019t trigger it. Life does.<\/span>\n\n\"Fleabag\"\n
\n

In Fleabag<\/em>, Phoebe Waller-Bridge offers an unflinching subtext for female pain.<\/p>\n

Image credit: BBC America<\/p>\n<\/figcaption>\n<\/figure>\n\nIt\u2019s poetic that this scene feels like a piece of writing and acting directly inspired from female rage \u2013 a sublime, breathless TV moment that doesn\u2019t ration its bite, astounding instead with its abject fearlessness. The pathos also acts as a reminder that for a gender whose existence is dictated by pointed diamonds of pain, coping can rarely be packaged as a respite. <\/span>\n\nFleabag<\/span><\/i> paints a defining portrait of the permanence of this pulversing emotion when Claire secretly suffers a miscarriage during a family dinner. When Fleabag ends up discovering her sister\u2019s tragedy and expresses concern, a wounded Claire retaliates by yelling, \u201cKeep your hands off my <\/span>miscarriage<\/span><\/a>. It\u2019s mine! It\u2019s mine!\u201d In those seconds, a distinct shade of rage seeps through Claire\u2019s face for she isn\u2019t just bearing the full extent of her pain but also simultaneously coping with it. But Claire’s coping doesn’t cleanse her pain; it merely equips her to tolerate it. At its primal state, as <\/span>Fleabag<\/span><\/i> posits, female coping is an endless cycle of mutiny. It is both, sunrise and sunset.<\/span>\n\nIt\u2019s no surprise then, that at its heart, the mordant <\/span>Fleabag <\/span><\/i>remained fixated with being an account of a woman in perpetual pain; a woman who doesn\u2019t heal but copes with her agony by not hiding it. If the show\u2019s comically dark first season introduced us to the origins of female pain, then this season offers an unflinching subtext for that pain, <\/span>permitting its female lead to flit through abandonment, guilt, heartbreak, loneliness, and isolation without editing out any of her suffering. It’s as if the show rebels against what Godmother (Olivia Colman) tells the sisters during their mother’s funeral, warning them that people get spooked out to be around “someone who is perpetually in pain”. In doing so, Waller-Bridge turns the presumed humiliation of a female setback on its head by deconstructing it and prodding the audience to confront its ruins.<\/span>\n\nTwo seasons and a bravura 12-episode run later, <\/span>Fleabag <\/span><\/i>stands on its own, as a modern tragedy: a dark exploration of what comes into play when women aren\u2019t made to obsess over terminating the umbilical cord of pain, but instead taught to cope by tolerating it. It feels almost devastating \u2013 and fitting \u2013 that the priest\u2019s (Andrew Scott) <\/span>visceral speech<\/span><\/a> about love in the show\u2019s finale can also be read as an ode to female coping. After all, just like being a romantic, even living with pain takes a \u201chell lot of hope\u201d. <\/span>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Phoebe Waller-Bridge reclaims the idea of female coping in Fleabag. It remains a mordant exploration of what comes into play when women aren\u2019t made to obsess over terminating the umbilical cord of pain, but instead taught to cope by tolerating it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":103,"featured_media":4534,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[82],"tags":[8056,8057,5844,8058,8059,5849],"class_list":["post-4531","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-pop-culture","tag-andrew-scott","tag-female-coping","tag-fleabag","tag-fleabag-review","tag-fleabag-season-2","tag-phoebe-waller-bridge"],"yoast_head":"\nHow Phoebe Waller-Bridge\u2019s Fleabag Taught Us the Art of Female Coping<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Phoebe Waller-Bridge reclaims the idea of female coping in Fleabag. 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