{"id":4159,"date":"2016-03-16T00:19:47","date_gmt":"2016-03-15T18:49:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=4159"},"modified":"2016-03-16T00:19:47","modified_gmt":"2016-03-15T18:49:47","slug":"why-do-we-hate-womens-magazines-feminism","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=4159","title":{"rendered":"Why Do We Hate Women\u2019s Magazines? They Gave Us Our First Lesson in Feminism After All"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I<\/span>still remember the first time I fell in <\/p>love<\/span><\/a>. I was walking to my 10th-grade Hindi <\/span>tuition<\/span><\/a> when a sexy woman stared back at me from the cover of a women\u2019s magazine in a second-hand book store. It wasn\u2019t just any old desi women\u2019s magazine with recipes of sarson ka saag and sage advice on how to be a sanskari bahu \u2013 it was a glossy, sophisticated, \u201cimported\u201d magazine.<\/span>\n\n\u201c10 Ways to Make a Man Weak in Bed,\u201d it screamed on the cover, next to a model wearing a red evening gown with a thigh-high slit and seven-inch heels that made her look impossibly tall and commanding. My Lady in Red looked like she had a million dollars in the bank and had men falling at her feet wherever she went. Immediately, the 15-year old me knew that I wanted to be like her because she looked like she never worried about boring things like conjugating verbs and remembering the difference between rabi and kharif crops. She\u2019d probably flick a middle finger at anyone who told her she wasn\u2019t right. <\/span>\n\nThat was the beginning of my obsession with women\u2019s magazines. I bought five of them that day and stashed them at the back of my cupboard taking them out regularly to fantasise about the amazing life I\u2019d have in the future, complete with a great career, a <\/span>fantastic man<\/span><\/a>, trendy clothes, and unlimited <\/span>make-up<\/span><\/a>. It promised me a life different from the lives of the women around me whose worries began and ended with the level of namak in a dish, <\/span>errant bais<\/span><\/a>, and rickshaw drivers who refused to take them where they wanted to go.\u00a0 <\/span>\n\nThis was my first lesson in <\/span>feminism<\/span><\/a>.<\/span>\n\nI followed these magazines more religiously than some people follow <\/span>Kylie Jenner<\/span><\/a>. At a time when <\/span>patriarchy<\/span><\/a> was so much a part of our DNA that most women didn\u2019t even recognise it until it hit them on the head or slapped them on the butt, women\u2019s magazines worked like an air freshener in a world stinking with misogyny. It cleared the air about women\u2019s issues without putting anybody\u2019s nose out of joint. It became easy for me to pretend that I was listening to everyone\u2019s opinion of how to be a <\/span>good girl<\/span><\/a>, while I secretly consulted my Lady in Red for advice about how to be a real woman.\u00a0Whenever the world was cruel and I felt my hopes and dreams slowly shrivel, I\u2019d take out my beloved magazines and feel my spirits revive. My Lady in Red was my agony aunt.<\/span>\n

Through the years, women\u2019s magazines have \u00a0shown women how to take time out for themselves, celebrate their womanhood in their own unique way and fall in love with themselves.<\/blockquote>\nShe was also my love and relationship guide.\u00a0\u201dFabulous looks that will take you from boardroom to <\/span>bedroom<\/span><\/a>,\u201d sounds horribly cheesy \u2013 or plain wrong \u2013 in today\u2019s world, but to a 15-year-old who was always told that compromise was part of a woman\u2019s life and <\/span>sex<\/span><\/a> was something to grin and bear until you had kids, my Lady in Red told me that a woman could succeed everywhere: the boardroom, the bedroom, and everywhere in between. She said it was okay to make the first move if I found my <\/span>Dhoni<\/span><\/a> just as it was okay to tell him to get lost if he turned out to be a <\/span>Hardik Pandya<\/span><\/a>.\u00a0She connected me to other women of the world through our common love for fashion, food, celebrities and romance. She was my guide to a life where I would have it all.<\/span>\n\nThirty years later, <\/span>feminism<\/span><\/a> is out of the shadows and in your face, but newer versions of my beloved magazines are ridiculed and not taken seriously. Just like women, they are accused of being too bold, too slutty, too frivolous, and sometimes, just plain dumb. Its focus on traditionally feminine interests like food, romance, clothes, and beauty products instead of topics like finance or <\/span>politics<\/span><\/a> is termed regressive and criticised for not keeping up with modern times. I don\u2019t understand why. \u201cFinding the Right Bra\u201d might not be a topic for national debate and it might even be a source of titillation for some, but it is surely a concern for all women. Such topics were and will always be a source of interest and pleasure for women. Men\u2019s magazines are notorious for putting out issues full of cars, <\/span>cricket<\/span><\/a>, and centrefolds, so why shouldn\u2019t women be informed about their choices about the things that they love? <\/span>\n\nI suspect the real reason these magazines are not taken seriously, sometimes even by feminists, runs deeper. Society has accepted, even demanded, that a woman be strong, responsible and independent. It acknowledges that a woman is entitled to have it all, but the definition of \u201chaving it all\u201d is still very narrow, limited to family and work. Society still has a huge problem with woman being fun and frivolous. The world applauds the woman who cracks the IIT or breaks the glass ceiling at her job, but immediately gets their knickers in a twist if a woman <\/span>drinks<\/span><\/a>, parties, \u201csleeps around\u201d, or in any way enjoys herself or puts herself first. Through the years, women\u2019s magazines have \u00a0shown women how to take time out for themselves, celebrate their womanhood in their own unique way and fall in love with themselves. Maybe, this is what makes people so uncomfortable with these magazines. \u00a0<\/span>\n\nAt the ripe old age of 46, my love for my Lady in Red has matured. I see her faults just like in any other relationship. She did encourage me to spend a lot on myself in my 20s \u2013 much more than what was wise, but that\u2019s okay. She left me with wonderful memories and experiences. She encouraged me to ask for what I want. She taught me that you don\u2019t become equal to men by putting them on a pedestal or having them fall at your feet: You do it by simply not thinking about them too much and focusing on yourself. That was unheard of in the \u201990s. Did my Lady in Red make me self-centred when I was younger? Maybe, but I was happy, which is why I still love women\u2019s magazines, warts and all.<\/span>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The world applauds the woman who cracks the IIT, but immediately gets their knickers in a twist if a woman drinks, parties, or puts herself first. Through the years, women\u2019s magazines have shown women how to fall in love with themselves. Maybe, this is what makes people so uncomfortable.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":179,"featured_media":4160,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[170],"tags":[4978,710,7542,7543,5256,7544],"class_list":["post-4159","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-gender","tag-equality","tag-feminism","tag-lady-in-red","tag-love-yourself","tag-patriarchy","tag-womens-magazines"],"yoast_head":"\nWhy Do We Hate Women\u2019s Magazines? 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