{"id":360,"date":"2016-06-05T14:21:52","date_gmt":"2016-06-05T14:21:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=360"},"modified":"2016-06-05T14:21:52","modified_gmt":"2016-06-05T14:21:52","slug":"leaked-arnab-goswamis-letter-indian-journalists","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=360","title":{"rendered":"LEAKED! Arnab Goswami\u2019s Letter to Indian Journalists!"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><div class=\"container page-content\"><p><span class=\"dropcap\">A<\/span><\/p><\/div><p>fter his rant about ISI agents masquerading as journalists, Arnab Goswami, newsman extraordinaire and right-wing sock puppet, sent out a letter to prominent scribes he deemed worthy of the title \u201cjournalist\u201d. One of these was addressed to Arr\u00e9\u2019s investigative duo, Weedward and Bongstein. The contents of the letter attempt to delineate the tenets of Arnab\u2019s School of Journalism. Even though this is a personal note, we\u2019ve decided to make it public in the larger interest of our readers, all 20 of them {with a few thoughts of our own in parenthesis}.<\/span><\/i>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dear Weedward and Bongstein,<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I\u2019m fighting the urge to write this entirely in UPPERCASE, but our very existence as upholders of the truth in this country I call my home, is threatened. For this, it is imperative that we gag all forms of free speech and thought {what about the new 10% extra speech?}. I\u2019m writing this letter to all investigative journalists of a certain calibre {why, thank you!}, because it is of utmost importance that we do not follow up on any story related to the systematic shutdown of anti-national thought in our country {wait, what?}.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To preserve our journalistic integrity, we need to follow a simple code of ethics based on the very principles of journalism I hold sacred {is gau mata more or less sacred than the principles?}. Just like that piece of leftist propaganda <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Fight Club<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, I have condensed these into three simple rules.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">RULE NUMBER 1: Decibel levels be damned. Say it loud, say it proud, you\u2019ve sold out. <\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The key to a successful interview is being heard above the constant din of the interviewees. When in doubt, shout.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">RULE NUMBER 2: He who fact-checks can fack off.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What are facts, but mere guidelines? In the quest for the truth, turn navigation off and make your own path. You may find the truth, you may not. At the end of the day, it\u2019s the journey that counts {wtf?}.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">RULE NUMBER 3: If you don\u2019t know who did it, it was probably Pakistan.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you don\u2019t understand this rule, you\u2019re probably Pakistani yourself.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">RULE NUMBER 4: Batman, Homer Simpson, and Barkha Dut are all ISI agents {wait, weren\u2019t there supposed to be just three rules?}.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How else can you explain their popularity? <\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If there\u2019s one thing we must remember during these turbulent times, it\u2019s that we refrain from questioning anything we don\u2019t agree with. Instead we must shout down this new crop of pseudo-secularists by calling them mujahideen. I have been accused of being a right-wing puppet repeatedly, but let me be clear, there\u2019s no other way for journalism to survive. If the nation wants to know, you tell the nation what you want it to know. Forget free thought, free speech and free Wi-Fi. The only way we can be well and truly free is by allowing ourselves to become instruments of that change {the only change you\u2019re capable of bringing about, Arnab, is for a hundred}. <\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So I implore you, my brothers and sisters, join me as we usher in a new era, as I, the most electrifying man in broadcast journalism {wait, isn\u2019t that Dwayne \u201cThe Rock\u201d Johnson\u2019s line, chor?} lead this regime.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I could go on for a while {we know}, but I\u2019m not used to typing this much. If you guys would just answer my phone calls {no chance} I could yell it at you personally {eat shit}. I tried messaging you guys on Facebook a few weeks ago {thought you were a pornbot, put you in the Others folder} but you guys haven\u2019t responded, which is actually the way I like it.<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Yours Loudly,<\/span>\n\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Arnab<\/span>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>India\u2019s Banshee-in-Chief sets out a code of ethics that reminds journalists that they must refrain from questioning anything the nation doesn\u2019t agree with.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":15,"featured_media":361,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[74],"tags":[62,63,64,65,66,67,324,71,72],"class_list":["post-360","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-disarre","tag-arre","tag-arre-digital-platform","tag-arre-originals","tag-arre-reads","tag-arre-text-articles","tag-arre-website","tag-disarre","tag-web-series","tag-web-shows"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>LEAKED! 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