{"id":3364,"date":"2016-05-31T01:55:47","date_gmt":"2016-05-30T20:25:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=3364"},"modified":"2016-05-31T01:55:47","modified_gmt":"2016-05-30T20:25:47","slug":"nosy-aunt-meddling","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=3364","title":{"rendered":"The Not-So-Subtle Art of Meddling: A Guide from Your Nosy Aunty"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

“K<\/span><\/p><\/div>

aamna fui, kabhi toh kisi ka acha bola karo!\u201d Remember the malicious aunt from <\/span>Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam <\/span><\/i>who spies on <\/span>Aishwarya Rai<\/span><\/a> and never has anything nice to say about anyone? That is my Phuppo, my <\/span>papa\u2019s<\/span><\/a> sister. <\/span>\n\nI had my first encounter with this creature called phuppo, when I was 15. After the demise of her husband in <\/span>Canada<\/span><\/a>, she returned to Karachi to live with us. I am a daddy\u2019s girl and was excited have his sister around. That enthusiasm died right after our dua-salaam, when my mother told her I was preparing for my board <\/span>exams<\/span><\/a>, and she responded with a sly smile said, \u201cPadh lo, padh lo. Ye padhai kaunsa kaam aayegi. Aagey toh kaam aayega wohi chulha, wohi chakki. (What use are your studies going to be, when you\u2019re going to spend all your time in the kitchen?)\u201d<\/span>\n\n\u201cMust be the jet lag,\u201d I told myself. But as I grew more familiar with Phuppo, I began to run out of excuses. No matter what I did, I found myself at the receiving end of my aunt\u2019s taunts. If I put on a pair of jeans, she\u2019d shame me for being \u201ctoo fast\u201d. If I wore a salwar kameez, she\u2019d find something to say about the neckline. She\u2019d always give me an earful about how I need to learn cooking and if she found me in the <\/span>kitchen<\/span><\/a>, I\u2019d either be holding the knife wrong or not slicing the potatoes correctly. <\/span>\n\nPhuppo has turned out to be a walking, talking reminder of everything that is wrong with me. For years I believed, I probably rubbed her the wrong way and she despised me. But Phuppo doesn\u2019t discriminate, she jibes at everyone from <\/span>mom<\/span><\/a> to the milkman.<\/span>\n\nMy aunt is suffering from a deadly, pervasive disease. And she is not the only one. \u00a0<\/span>\n\n

Phuppoism is a curse that has not spared anyone. A Google search on \u201cWhy are aunts so mean?\u201d throws up hundreds of results. <\/p><\/blockquote>\n\nThere is a Phuppo in every neighbourhood. He or she is the one keeping a check on the timings of all the girls in the locality and asking young people how much they are earning. They could be your nasty sister-in-law, <\/span>nosy neighbour<\/span><\/a>, your meddling mama, or the mean girls from your high school. They are all sufferers of Phuppoism, a dreaded condition \u2013 a syndrome that finds no entry in The Lancet journal, that no WebMD can diagnose. But don\u2019t let that fool you into believing that this malignant strain is harmless. <\/span>\n\nPhuppoism is characterised by an ability to constantly find yourself in a place where you have no business to be \u2013 such as the lives of others. Sufferers have a sharp tongue and a nose that somehow finds its way into other people\u2019s business. They spend their time <\/span>gossipping<\/span><\/a>, questioning everyone\u2019s life choices, and doling out <\/span>free advice<\/span><\/a>. The Phuppo Bible is titled, <\/span>The Not-So-Subtle Art of Giving a Fuck<\/span><\/i>. \u00a0<\/span>\n\nPop culture is filled with Phuppos, who take the avatar of evil \u2013 but mostly meddlesome \u2013 <\/span>stepmothers<\/span><\/a> or stepsisters in Cinderella and other fairy tales. Harry Potter\u2019s Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia, who make the boy stay in the cupboard under the stairs and make him wear Dudley\u2019s oversized clothes; Simba\u2019s Uncle Scar from <\/span>The Lion King<\/span><\/i>, and \u201cThe Evil One\u201d, Nicholas\u2019 aunt from <\/span>Saki\u2019s \u201cThe Lumber Room\u201d all suffer from Phupposim. Bollywood\u2019s Queen of Phuppoism is Lalita Pawar, so much so that \u201cthe Lalita Pawar of our family\u201d has become a catchphrase of sorts. For the <\/span>millennial<\/span><\/a>, <\/span>Game of Thrones<\/span><\/i>\u2019 Cersei Lannister is a typical Phuppo.<\/span>\n\nPhuppoism is a curse that has not spared anyone. A Google search on \u201cWhy are aunts so mean?\u201d throws up hundreds of results. There\u2019s a Reddit post on an \u201c<\/span>aunt<\/span><\/a> who just totally broke my heart\u201d and a Quora discussion on \u201cHow do I get over my aunt shouting at me?\u201d with suggestions that vary from \u201cshe\u2019s only human, just a little screwed up\u201d to suck it up, \u201cthis is a part of growing up\u201d. <\/span>\n\nNot enough to pacify me, but it warms the cockles of my heart to know that there are bitchy meddling people everywhere, not just on Privet Drive, King\u2019s Landing, and my home. <\/span>\n\nGotta go, my Phuppo is calling out to me. I think I boiled the potatoes all wrong. <\/span>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Your mean aunt or nasty neighbour suffer from a dreaded condition. It is called Phuppoism. It is characterised by an ability to constantly find yourself in a place where you have no business to be \u2013 such as the lives of others.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":252,"featured_media":3365,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[107],"tags":[6421,6486,6487,18,6488,6489,22],"class_list":["post-3364","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-pov","tag-aunt","tag-aunty","tag-bua","tag-family","tag-nosy-aunt","tag-phupha","tag-relationships"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Not-So-Subtle Art of Meddling: A Guide from Your Nosy Aunty<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Your mean aunt or nasty neighbour suffer from a dreaded condition. It is called Phuppoism. 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