{"id":3103,"date":"2016-04-09T14:24:25","date_gmt":"2016-04-09T08:54:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=3103"},"modified":"2016-04-09T14:24:25","modified_gmt":"2016-04-09T08:54:25","slug":"enter-the-dragon-my-battle-with-a-bat-straight-out-of-game-of-thrones","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=3103","title":{"rendered":"Enter the Dragon: My Battle with a Bat, Straight Out of Game of Thrones"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

D<\/span><\/p><\/div>

o you have an irrational fear of lizards, spiders, snakes, or fish? Or heights? Or closed spaces? Well, then you\u2019re certainly not alone. Approximately 10 per cent of people <\/span>in America alone<\/span><\/a>, suffer from some phobia or the other.<\/span>\n\nI discovered mine on my <\/span>honeymoon<\/span><\/a> in Paris. After a long serpentine queue, my wife and I finally made it to the top of the Eiffel Tower. The sun was going down, the air was brisk and nippy, the view out of the world. It was romantic with a capital R. <\/span>\n\nAnd then I looked down. A sheer 300-metre drop to the bottom. I completely lost my shit. <\/span>\n\nIt felt as if my stomach had suddenly emptied out and my head was dizzy and I was scared as a jack rabbit caught in headlights. I held on tight to my wife saying we have to get out of here NOW! She couldn\u2019t understand why I was saying that just 10 seconds after reaching the top. But I must have looked like a ghost, so instead of arguing as she always does, she escorted me into the lift \u2013 and as we went down, my heartbeat gradually settled. Later I found out I have acrophobia, a fear of heights.<\/span>\n\nMy wife, not one to be left behind, has arachnophobia. She will burst into squeals of terror at the mere sight of a small spider on a windowsill. Imagine what happened when one appeared at her shower stall in an Airbnb in the Lake District in England recently. And I, the valiant knight, came to the rescue. <\/span>\n\nHero Number 1. For squashing a small defenceless thing to death for no fault of its own. Am I murderer? A protector? Or just a <\/span>guy<\/span><\/a> who likes to see his wife not panicking?<\/span>\n\nAbout a year ago, my 16-year-old daughter was putting on her jeans and she felt something soft and squishy against her thigh. She pulls down the jeans to discover a semi-squashed lizard. Her screams are worthy of the tortured souls on <\/span>Game of Thrones<\/span><\/i><\/a>. Today my house has peacock feathers in the unlikeliest of places because peacock feathers are to lizards what lizards are to us\u2026 go figure. Something about evolution and visible hazards and a handy tip for those of you out there who share a similar aversion toward our small reptilian friends.<\/span>\n\nMy younger daughter \u2013 at age eight \u2013 refused to step into the pristine waters of the Koh Samui beach because there are tiny little fish in the sea. She is terrified. No matter how much I try and talk sense into both my daughters and wife about these being completely irrational fears, nothing seems to work. I am surprised at the number of many other, perfectly rational people who have these same phobias. <\/span>\n\nAccording to Wikipedia, \u201cphobias can be divided into\u00a0<\/span>specific phobias<\/span><\/a>,\u00a0<\/span>social phobia<\/span><\/a>, and\u00a0<\/span>agoraphobia<\/span><\/a>.\u201d These can include the fear of \u201ccertain animals, natural environment situations, blood or injury, and specific situations\u201d, though the most common are\u00a0<\/span>spiders<\/span><\/a>,\u00a0<\/span>snakes<\/span><\/a>, and\u00a0<\/span>heights<\/span><\/a>. (Yay! My family and I are in the top 3!)<\/span>\n\nAnyway, despite my acrophobia, I see myself as a sceptic and a rationalist and a <\/span>guru<\/span><\/a> advising my family and flock about their phobias… until a bat flies into my room last night.<\/span>\n\nI am watching <\/span>GoT<\/span><\/i>, a sequence that involves dragons. Suddenly, I hear a flutter of wings and a mini dragon enters. For a second I wonder if I\u2019m imagining this, if art is becoming reality \u2013 because by now, I confess, I am a bit <\/span>high<\/span><\/a>. But no. The apparition is real. And apparent.<\/span>\n\nImmediately I think this could go viral if I shoot it. But my phone is 10 feet away and I am scared to reach for it. I recall a line from a poem \u2013 \u201cBats clutch out human hair with demon force\u201d \u2013 I cover my head with my hands and rediscover that thankfully, I have no hair. Fuck the <\/span>phone<\/span><\/a>. How do I get the demon out of the room?<\/span>\n\nLike the dragons of <\/span>GoT<\/span><\/i>, it is flying hard and fast with full confidence. All that is missing is the hissing. The Song of Ice and Fire. It is light, agile, and big enough to be threatening to a small guy like me. I immediately Google my mind \u2013 since I can\u2019t reach my computer \u2013 and recall that bats don\u2019t like lights. So I turn on all the lights. He\u2019s still flying around like he is king of the fucking castle.<\/span>\n\nLets kill him with the fans! I turn on both fans at full speed hoping the fucker will be crushed to pulp under one of their wings.<\/span>\n\nNo such luck.<\/span>\n\nIn desperation, I say, \u201cI, RayC, House of Chaudhuri, The First Born, Ruler of the Seven Kingdoms and Protector of the Realms must step up to the task.\u201d<\/span>\n\nThe first weapon I choose in my sparsely furnished half guest-house, half shooting-floor, half rendezvous point of illicit alliances and substances, is a piece of thermocol.<\/span>\n\nNot smart. Thermocol breaks easily, and before I can swing my sword at the enemy, it disintegrates in my hand as if the <\/span>White Walkers<\/span><\/a> had just walked in.<\/span>\n\nIn desperation I look around for another weapon. A roll of toilet paper? My laptop? A poster?<\/span> I go with a plastic hanger. Not quite Valyrian steel, but equal to the task.<\/span>\n\nThe battle between Man and Bat takes 10 minutes. And Man wins.<\/span>\n\nI was Batman.<\/span>\n\nHave you ever seen a dead bat?<\/span> I saw it for the first time today. It was the prototype of a dragon.<\/span> Half of land. Half of sky. Entirely of legend.<\/span>\n\nIt was small and exquisitely beautiful and it did no harm. But I had to kill it because it created an irrational fear in me. <\/span>\n\n

Am I murderer? A protector? Or just a guy who likes to see his wife not panicking?<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\nI breathlessly <\/span>WhatsApp<\/span><\/a> the story to my family. My wife tells me to wash my hands because bats have rabies.<\/span>\n\nI take her advice and wash my hands. And as I did, I wept. I still don\u2019t know whether out of relief, the extinguishing of an irrational fear, or because I had blood of an innocent creature on my hands. \u00a0<\/span>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I am surprised at the number of perfectly rational people who display phobias like the fear of household lizards and heights. And I was perfectly rational too\u2026 until a bat entered my room, looking like a mini dragon, while I watched Game of Thrones.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":60,"featured_media":3104,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[6078,6079,1461,6080,6081,6082,6083,309,2213,6084,6085,6086,6087,939],"class_list":["post-3103","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-animals","tag-acrophobia","tag-arachnophobia","tag-batman","tag-bats","tag-daenerys-stormborn","tag-dragons","tag-drogon","tag-game-of-thrones","tag-khaleesi","tag-phobias","tag-rabies","tag-rhaegal","tag-viseryon","tag-whatsapp"],"yoast_head":"\nEnter the Dragon: My Battle with a Bat, Straight Out of Game of Thrones<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I am surprised at the number of perfectly rational people who display phobias like the fear of household lizards and heights. 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And I was perfectly rational too\u2026 until a bat entered my room, looking like a mini dragon, while I watched Game of Thrones.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=3103\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Arr\u00e9\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2016-04-09T08:54:25+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/1533544116.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1520\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"850\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"RayC\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"Enter the Dragon: My Battle with a Bat, Straight Out of Game of Thrones\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:description\" content=\"I am surprised at the number of perfectly rational people who display phobias like the fear of household lizards and heights. 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