{"id":2760,"date":"2016-07-22T05:19:03","date_gmt":"2016-07-21T23:49:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=2760"},"modified":"2016-07-22T05:19:03","modified_gmt":"2016-07-21T23:49:03","slug":"oceans-8-indian-soap","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=2760","title":{"rendered":"Kahaani Chor Chor Ki: What If Ocean\u2019s 8 Were an Indian TV Soap?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

O<\/span><\/p><\/div>

cean\u2019s 8 is out today, the first film in the popular franchise to have an entirely female-led cast. But sorry Sandra Bullock, Cate Blanchett, and Rihanna, Indian TV has you beat this time. We\u2019ve been fervently following female-led stories for years, as the success of shows like Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi <\/i>and Naagin <\/i>will attest to. While family drama<\/a>, shapeshifting, and other subjects have been covered ad nauseam, one scenario left for Indian soaps to explore is a cracker heist, a la the Oceans <\/i>franchise.\n\nHow would Ocean\u2019s 8<\/i> play out, if it were an Indian TV show?\n\nThe Hollywood version has Debbie Ocean, Danny Ocean\u2019s sister, planning a heist at the Met Gala with her partner-in-crime <\/a>Lou. At the Gala, their object of utmost interest is the $150-million necklace, the \u201cToussaint\u201d. To execute this heist, Debbie and Lou hire a jewellery maker, a fashion designer, a hacker, a profiteer, and a hustler.\n\nOur Indian TV show opens with the protagonist, Debjaani Sagar, planning a heist of her own \u2013 at the Marwari <\/a>wedding of the decade. Debjaani plans to steal the rani haar, which is worth over \u20b9100 crores, at the wedding. Debjaani\u2019s nefarious intentions are revealed early on with serious exposition that includes her wearing too much eyeliner, always having a single brow raised, and a droning background score that sounds like it\u2019s signalling a Satanic cult to commence its ritual.\n\nBut first, Debjaani needed an invitation. This is where her friend and partner in crime, Leena, comes into the picture. Leena\u2019s mother and the groom\u2019s 200-year-old dadi go to the same temple <\/a>everyday. But just a regular invitation will not cut it. Leena needs to be intimately involved with the wedding \u2013 like milni ceremony-level involved.\n\n

Debjani and Leena hire a jewellery designer to create a fake rani haar, to swap with the real deal.<\/p><\/blockquote> \n\nFor this, Leena needs to become romantically involved with the groom\u2019s brother. It\u2019s a cinch \u2013 she\u2019s pretty, wears make-up and jewellery to bed, and is an expert at corny and clich\u00e9d seduction <\/a>techniques like hair-flipping and eyelid-batting. All Leena needs to do is fall from a flight of stairs at the right time and wait for the groom\u2019s brother to save her. Cue 20 minutes of reaction shots.\n\nNow that they\u2019re close to the groom\u2019s family, it\u2019s time to replicate the obligatory \u201cgetting the team together\u201d montage that is sure to make it to the movie trailer. Debjani and Leena hire a jewellery designer to create a fake rani haar, to swap with the real deal. They then bribe the bride\u2019s <\/a>bodacious beautician to place the fake necklace around the bride\u2019s neck.\n\nThe event manager of the wedding<\/a>, Kavitaji, and the photographer, Chitra, are recruited as extra sets of prying eyes, and also so that the camera can suddenly cut to their faces whenever over-dramatisation is immediately required. A sangeet choreographer was never integral to the plan, but was brought on board to provide a opportunities for the show to present five-minute-long song-and-dance sequences.\n\nSince this is a typical Marwari family, Debjaani realises that the bride would never really trust hired help. For many episodes, we see Debjaani staring blankly into the distance as an over-serious voice-over (provided by her) ponders this situation<\/a>.\n\nThrough a convenient deus ex Ekta, one fine day, Debjaani simply walks in on the bride\u2019s poor and jealous best friend arguing with her saas about buying an expensive sari for the wedding<\/a>. Recruiting the best friend completes the remarkable and infallible Sagar\u2019s 8<\/i>.\n\nIn Ocean\u2019s 8<\/i>, Debbie Ocean takes five years to plan the heist, but the whole story will fit into a 90-minute film. On Indian TV, it will take five years to establish all eight characters. That\u2019s what spending 80 per cent of every episode\u2019s runtime on slo-mo shots of the charming beta of the show will do. The wedding itself is a 50-episode saga with heavily sequinned saris that look no different from the rani haar itself, neverending songs, and cringe comedy.\n\nExpect a couple of twists to be introduced just when the TRPs are sliding. We will learn that the bride is the reincarnation of Debjaani\u2019s saas, whose jewellery Debjaani had stolen 20 years ago. We\u2019ll also find out that Leena is actually a shapeshifting mosquito <\/a>who has been carrying a grudge against the bride\u2019s family for using too much Odomos (please forward this to marketing team right away).\n\nIf you\u2019ve managed to make it this far with Sagar\u2019s 8<\/i>, you\u2019ll be dying to know how the story ends. Unfortunately, the show\u2019s writers won\u2019t be able to answer your questions. All answers lie with whichever numerologist the executive producer listens to.\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Meet Debjaani Sagar, the homegrown version of Debbie Ocean from Ocean\u2019s 8. With her gang of desi girls, she\u2019s attempting the heist of the decade in a caper filled with shapeshifting mosquitoes, revenge plots, and reincarnations.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":254,"featured_media":2761,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[82],"tags":[5476,5534,5609,4584,3982,5610,8,21,5611,4496,5612,1726,1648,291],"class_list":["post-2760","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-pop-culture","tag-bride","tag-bridegroom","tag-ceremony","tag-families","tag-indians","tag-jewellery","tag-marijuana","tag-marriage","tag-marwaari","tag-money","tag-oceans","tag-parents","tag-soaps","tag-tv"],"yoast_head":"\nKahaani Chor Chor Ki: What If Ocean\u2019s 8 Were an Indian TV Soap?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Meet Debjaani Sagar, the homegrown version of Debbie Ocean from Ocean\u2019s 8. 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With her gang of desi girls, she\u2019s attempting the heist of the decade in a caper filled with shapeshifting mosquitoes, revenge plots, and reincarnations.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=2760\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Arr\u00e9\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2016-07-21T23:49:03+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/1529671825.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1520\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"850\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Akhil Kakkar\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"Kahaani Chor Chor Ki: What If Ocean\u2019s 8 Were an Indian TV Soap?\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:description\" content=\"Meet Debjaani Sagar, the homegrown version of Debbie Ocean from Ocean\u2019s 8. 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