{"id":217,"date":"2016-05-22T10:13:12","date_gmt":"2016-05-22T10:13:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=217"},"modified":"2016-05-22T10:13:12","modified_gmt":"2016-05-22T10:13:12","slug":"censor-di-m-di","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=217","title":{"rendered":"Censor Di M** Di"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

T<\/span>he Central Board of Film Certification has, once again, displayed an uncanny knack of remaining in the news. This time a committee has objected to a movie based in Punjab, making references to Punjab. This may not come as a surprise because our censor board, over the last week, has fought hard for the government\u2019s Employee of the Year Award, by carrying on a nonsensical campaign against any kind of creative expression that doesn\u2019t fit the views of that 40-year-old uncle who sends \u201cnon-veg jokes\u201d on WhatsApp.\n\nThe committee wanted to temper the \u201creality\u201d of the film about drug abuse in Punjab, demanding that the producers only release it after 89 cuts, including all references to the state, its politics, and the upcoming elections. So what the board is essentially saying is, \u201cHey social media, there\u2019s a movie about drugs in Punjab, but we don\u2019t want you to know that it\u2019s happening in Punjab, so we\u2019re making a big deal about it!\u201d Which is probably not the way I would have done it. The producers, Anurag Kashyap in particular, argue that it\u2019s one of our more realistic movies in recent times, and <\/p>referred<\/a> to the dictatorship in North Korea to drive home his point about censorship.\n\nMeanwhile, Bollywood has been allowed to systematically perpetuate ridiculous stereotypes of nearly all races and communities over the years, with no cuts. Here\u2019s a few that you missed out on, censor board.\n\nFor instance, why is your typical south Indian man always \u201cMadrasi\u201d? And why do they always exclaim \u201caiyoo\u201d? Should the Kerala government not be up in arms about most of Johnny Lever\u2019s career? (In Khiladi<\/em>, one of Lever\u2019s most memorable roles, he played an obnoxious Malyali nariyal paaniwala<\/a> with four children to feed, and two machetes lodged in his dhoti.)\n

Not everyone has the same sense of humour. But if we\u2019re so worried about the \u201creality\u201d of this very serious situation in Punjab, shouldn\u2019t we also spare a thought for all the people we offend when trying to be funny?<\/blockquote>\nWhat about Deepika Padukone\u2019s cringeworthy accent in Chennai Express<\/em>? You probably thought that was cool, since Padukone is South Indian anyway. But we\u2019re sorry to break it to you, she\u2019s Konkani, not Tamilian. (Ten points if you learnt the difference between the two from a Bollywood film). The movie also featured a Punjabi rapper repeating \u201clungi dance\u201d over and over, so as not to lose out on that all-important north Indian appeal, and ensure south Indians hate the North even more.\n\nBut since the objections to the film, led by Punjab\u2019s ruling party, Shiromani Akali Dal, are to the negative portrayal of the state, let\u2019s focus on Punjab. In almost all Karan Johar or Yash Chopra films, Punjabis are OTT, Patiala-peg chugging, Lassi-guzzling, Sarson-field rappers (or Bhangra artists if they\u2019re wearing turbans). Is that the real Punjab, censor board? Is Kirron Kher really everyone\u2019s mother there?\n\nJust as the South has its lungis and Bengal has its rosogollas, the poor Parsis have their stereotypes too. They\u2019re always wearing those round hats and walking with black canes. In their free time they\u2019re waxing eloquent about vintage cars. Why aren\u2019t Parsis up in arms about that? The Goan tourists doing drugs and going to raves might be semi-accurate, but don\u2019t you think you should\u2019ve cut out the parts about all local Catholic Goans being drunk all the time? Doesn\u2019t that count as negative portrayal? Oh, and also, what happened to the Northeast? Have you censored all of it out, just like the Indian media?\n\nAnd while we are at it, why do we not ban scenes that portray Indian men as your typical north Indian, gym-loving, sunglass-wearing assholes? Why don\u2019t we ban scenes where women are objectified by letchy men? And seriously, shouldn\u2019t we drop the homosexual pansy stereotype already?\n\nAnother critique the censor board has for Udta Punjab<\/em> is the \u201cexcessive swearing\u201d. Meanwhile, Riteish Deshmukh continues to star in his \u201cLet\u2019s Tease Women For A Bit\u201d movies supported by fugly friend Tusshar Kapoor. Deshmukh was also the lead in something called Grand Masti<\/em>. How the fuck did this pass your approval, board? Was the awful pun not obvious enough? How is something like Mastizaade<\/em>, a movie about two idiot sex-obsessed molesters, acceptable? How is Tusshar Kapoor inserting random objects into a homosexual man\u2019s butthole funny?\n\nMaybe we don\u2019t understand humour the same way all these people do, and that\u2019s fair. Not everyone has the same sense of humour. But if we\u2019re so worried about the \u201creality\u201d of this very serious situation in Punjab, shouldn\u2019t we also spare a thought for all the people we offend when trying to be funny? For instance, in Sajid Khan\u2019s tragedy Housefull<\/em>, Chunky Pandey plays an \u201cItalian\u201d man named Aakhri Pasta. If the exaggerated accent and hand gestures weren\u2019t enough, he also throws around Spanish<\/em> phrases like \u201cse\u00f1orita\u201d and \u201cgracias\u201d, which is one way to offend the people of three countries in one go.\n\nSo there you have it, CBFC. We\u2019re not asking for much \u2013 just an appeal to put the cens back in the censor board.\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A film about drug abuse in Punjab is objectionable. But it is okay to portray all Catholic Goans as drunks and all south Indians as lungi-wearing \u201cMadrasis\u201d.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":218,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[107],"tags":[62,63,64,65,66,67,141,372,323,373,374,71,72],"class_list":["post-217","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-pov","tag-arre","tag-arre-digital-platform","tag-arre-originals","tag-arre-reads","tag-arre-text-articles","tag-arre-website","tag-bollywood","tag-censor-board","tag-censorship","tag-mastizaade","tag-udta-punjab","tag-web-series","tag-web-shows"],"yoast_head":"\nCensor Di M** Di<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A film about drug abuse in Punjab is objectionable. 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