{"id":1746,"date":"2016-07-23T00:59:54","date_gmt":"2016-07-23T00:59:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=1746"},"modified":"2016-07-23T00:59:54","modified_gmt":"2016-07-23T00:59:54","slug":"bitoo-shruti-band-baaja-baaraat-ranveer-singh-anushka-sharma-bollywood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=1746","title":{"rendered":"Checking on Bitoo and Shruti, Nine Years After Band Baaja Baaraat"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\n\nB<\/span>\n\n<\/div>\nack in 2010, those who invested in <\/span>Bitcoin<\/span><\/a> had the same amount of blind optimism for their move proving successful as Bitoo and Shruti had for Shaadi Mubarak becoming a success. The two are perhaps the most iconic wedding planners from Bollywood since this <\/span>Delhi Swagmeister<\/span><\/a>. By the end of <\/span>Band Baaja Baaraat<\/span><\/i>, the duo left us with all kinds of #CoupleGoalz. But whatever happened to sweet \u2019ol Bitty Boo and Shruti Kakks after the end credits? We managed to get hold of the couple\u2019s marriage counsellor, who, on the condition of anonymity, agreed to spill the beans on the couple\u2019s life post the end credits of <\/span>Band Baaja Baaraat<\/span><\/i>. <\/span>\n\nTrigger Warning: Fans of <\/span>Band Baaja Baaraat<\/span><\/i>, some of our findings might be hard to digest, much like Bitoo and Shruti\u2019s staple diet of bread pakora and chowmein. <\/span>\n\nDoc! Thank you for talking to us again. Tell us, how has married life been for Bitoo and Shruti these past nine years?<\/b>\n\nSee, like you must have realised from our <\/span>past interactions<\/span><\/a>, marriage is <\/span>hard<\/span><\/a>. And I must admit, it\u2019s taken a lot of \u201ctarqeebein\u201d for Bitoo and Shruti to keep their relationship afloat. After the initial honeymoon phase, they began to realise that they are both too similar and have the same borderline <\/span>narcissistic<\/span><\/a> personalities. A fact I learned myself when they narrated the story of the first wedding they planned together: The two egomaniacs totally stole that poor bride and groom\u2019s thunder with their Ainveying around on what was supposed to be the couple\u2019s most special day. <\/span>\n\nHaha. Whatevs. Ainveyi was awesome! <\/b>\n\nYes, that it is. But their marital <\/span>troubles<\/span><\/a> began as soon as Shruti read one of those online conspiracy theories that argued Bitoo and her entire marriage might be a set-up by their former boss, Chanda m\u2019aam, aka older <\/span>Anusha Dandekar<\/span><\/a>. She began accusing Bitoo of being in love with her since the first time they bonded over \u201cbiskoots\u201d. And she had reason to believe this as well when you consider that Bitoo\u2019s proposal involved telling his future wife that \u201cTere bina ladkiyaan taadne mein koi mazaa nahi hai?\u201d In hindsight, that might be one of the smoothest ways of conveying to someone that you want an <\/span>open marriage<\/span><\/a>.<\/span>\n\nWhat. The. Fuck?<\/b>\n\nLuckily, Shruti\u2019s hunch was not completely true.<\/span>\n\nPhew! Wait, what do you mean not completely?<\/b>\n\nI mean, while there was no conspiracy with Chanda, Bitoo later admitted that he did in fact marry Shruti mainly for other reasons. See, Bitoo and Shruti\u2019s wasn\u2019t a marriage. It was a ruthless start-up acquisition. Theirs isn\u2019t a love story. It\u2019s the story of how one ambitionless boy learnt the ropes of wedding planning under the tutelage of a shrewd, no-nonsense businesswoman, and then went on to infiltrate her company as a partner, eventually seducing her into giving him a lifelong stake in said company through marriage. Don\u2019t let his chocolate boy looks and naivete fool you, Bitoo is a straight-up Janakpuriya G. Once Shru realised this, the couple began to see me.<\/span>\n\nDamn. Poor Shruti.<\/b>\n\nRight?! She often confides to me about how her life could have been \u00a0different if Chetan wasn\u2019t asked to unceremoniously \u201ckat le\u201d that night. \u201cI could have been one of those cool Dubai trophy wives who did interior design as a hobby, doc!\u201d she complained recently.<\/span>\n\nApart from that, Shruti also regularly laments at how she should have never trusted a guy who wears blazer jackets loud enough to put <\/span>Ganpati<\/span><\/a> processions to shame. Plus, the lawsuit against Bitoo and Shruti in 2014 only made things worse. <\/span>\n

They are planning to shut shop and invest in one of those fusion food restaurants that mix desi khana with global cuisine<\/blockquote>\nWait, what lawsuit?<\/b>\n\nYes. A fringe group from Rajasthan, got a hold of security footage which shows Bitoo scaling the venue for Siddhwani\u2019s wedding, the Lalgarh Palace in Bikaner, an important cultural landmark for Rajputs. If that wasn\u2019t bad enough, they also acquired footage of the couple sloppily making out while on their ancestors\u2019 sacred territory! The group was enraged and initially considered cutting Shruti\u2019s nose but realised she had done enough damage there <\/span>on her own<\/span><\/a>. So they settled for threatening to <\/span>cut Bitoo\u2019s legs<\/span><\/a> instead.<\/span>\n\nWow. But why cut legs?<\/b>\n\nBecause apparently, only directors\u2019 heads are worth cutting. Actor heads are generally useless. Jeez! I don\u2019t know. Can we move on?<\/span>\n\nOkay. Is Shaadi Mubarak at least still in business? <\/b>\n\nNot really. In many ways, Shaadi Mubarak was a stellar business model for 2010. Bitoo took care of catering, lighting, and security while Shruti took care of music, choreography, and decoration. Because obviously, back then it was believed that women were better at flower decorations and men at handling labourers. But for the past couple of years, Shaadi Mubarak has struggled to keep up with these <\/span>woke<\/span><\/a> millennial weddings. These days, no amount of Vaibhavi Merchant\u2019s choreography can make up for 300 drone shots and innovative <\/span>wedding hashtags<\/span><\/a>. They told me they are planning to shut shop and have invested in one of those fusion food restaurants that mix desi khana with global cuisine. Their signature dish is some kind of abomination which combines chowmein and bread pakora. I wish them luck. *Dry heaves*<\/span>\n\nFuck. Is anything going well for anyone from that movie?!<\/b>\n\nI guess Shruti\u2019s family have been doing well. Her dad went on to have a successful career on <\/span>Saturday Night Live<\/span><\/a>. Though I\u2019m afraid I can\u2019t say the same for Bitoo\u2019s family of sugarcane farmers.<\/span>\n\nUh-oh. And lastly, is there an update on what\u2019s happening with them in 2019?<\/b>\n\nWell, Bitoo spends most of his time reading up on his <\/span>GoT <\/span><\/i>fan fiction and won 2nd place with his <\/span>Khal Drogo cosplay<\/span><\/a> last month. As for Shruti, she\u2019s gotten super into cricket. While their relationship remains profoundly dysfunctional, they both insist there\u2019s nothing <\/span>Wrogn.<\/span><\/a>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We managed to get hold of Bitoo Sharma and Shruti Kakkar\u2019s marriage counsellor, who, on the condition of anonymity, agreed to spill the beans on the couple\u2019s life post the end-credits of Band Baaja Baaraat.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":166,"featured_media":1747,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[82],"tags":[1531,3400,3401,3402,141,21,3403,3404,2834,1147,3405,3406,3407,3408,3409,3410,3411],"class_list":["post-1746","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-pop-culture","tag-anushka-sharma","tag-band-baaja-baaraat","tag-bitoo","tag-bitoo-sharma","tag-bollywood","tag-marriage","tag-marriage-counseling","tag-marriage-counsellor","tag-padmavati","tag-ranveer-singh","tag-shaadi","tag-shaadi-mubarak","tag-shruti","tag-shruti-kakkar","tag-virushka","tag-wedding","tag-wedding-planner"],"yoast_head":"\nChecking on Bitoo and 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