{"id":1621,"date":"2016-04-23T13:41:36","date_gmt":"2016-04-23T13:41:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=1621"},"modified":"2026-07-17T14:12:33","modified_gmt":"2026-07-17T14:12:33","slug":"tumhari-sulu-movie-review-vidya-balan-manav-kaul-indian-housewives","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=1621","title":{"rendered":"Tumhari Sulu and the Real Housewives of India"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I<\/span><\/p><\/div>

n Suresh Triveni\u2019s <\/span>Tumhari Sulu<\/span><\/i><\/a>, Vidya Balan\u2019s eponymous Sulochana Dubey, a middle-aged suburban homemaker plays an iteration of the Indian Everywoman. Like millions of married women across the country, she starts her day early in the morning, waking up hurriedly to cook breakfast, pack her husband\u2019s and son\u2019s lunch, while simultaneously doubling up as their alarm clocks and forcing them out of bed, and into the bathroom before readying them up for the day ahead. Once they\u2019re safely out of the house, her me time begins. She\u2019s no longer a mother, or a wife. <\/span>\n\nShe is Sulu. <\/span>\n\nThis solitary afternoon of the homemaker is a deeply interesting space. Most films with a married woman as their protagonist have a tendency to dwell on the start and the end of the days of these women; the period of time that sum up their identity as the caregiver. No one ponders much on the middle <\/span>\u2013<\/span> the part where the homemaker is the only one to be left behind at home. <\/span>Tumhari Sulu <\/span><\/i>refreshingly gives us a glimpse into Sulu\u2019s afternoons, where she is in the kitchen prepping for dinner while listening to her favourite radio channel or unknowingly ending up taking a harmless nap. <\/span>\n\nIt\u2019s only at this time of the day <\/span> \u2013 <\/span>a little after the exhaustion of the morning duties has waned, and slightly before the madness of the night-time duties begins <\/span>\u2013<\/span> that it is feasible to disassociate the caregiver trait from a married woman\u2019s identity. In the afternoons, it\u2019s manageable to think of Sulu as an individual yearning for some company, freedom (like her high-flying neighbours), and acknowledge the extreme loneliness that she harbours as a result of the physically and emotionally grueling labour that is her everyday life.<\/span>\n\n\"Tumhari\n

\n

Sulu\u2019s loneliness makes itself visible in small ways: She is seen whiling away time talking to a pigeon parked at her window sill and participating in umpteen radio contests.<\/p>\n

T-Series\/Ellipsis Entertainment<\/p>\n<\/figcaption>\n<\/figure>\n\nSulu\u2019s loneliness makes itself visible in small ways: She is seen whiling away time talking to a pigeon parked at her window sill and participating in umpteen radio contests (including a Lata Mangeshkar Sad Song contest) and winning them. In one scene, when she gets a call from her favourite radio channel telling her that she has won the \u201cSawaal Batao, Seeti Bajao\u201d contest, and will be on air with their resident RJ, Sulu\u2019s loneliness is more apparent. Her face lights up simply at the thought of having another voice for company. She is uncontrollably excited to step out of her house in the afternoon to collect her prize. It is here that Sulu\u2019s lonely existence ceases. <\/span>\n\nBut Sulu is different from Nimrat Kaur\u2019s Ila. Unlike Sulu, Ila\u2019s loneliness in Ritesh Batra\u2019s <\/span>The Lunchbox<\/span><\/i> is much more acute. It\u2019s what prompts her unlikely friendship with Saajan Fernandes (<\/span>Irrfan Khan<\/span><\/a>), a man who she has never met, but to whom she pours her heart out to. Ila\u2019s loneliness is slightly recent and isn\u2019t completely hardwired into her existence the way it is for Sulu, <\/span>Sridevi\u2019s<\/span><\/a> Shashi in <\/span>English Vinglish<\/span><\/i>, or our <\/span>mothers<\/span><\/a>. Perhaps that\u2019s why Ila is so quick to identify its actuality, as opposed to Sulu and Shashi who are yet to put a finger on the problem that they think has no name. Unlike one of Betty Friedan\u2019s subjects whom she quoted in <\/span>The Feminine Mystique<\/span><\/i><\/a>, they haven\u2019t yet reached the stage where they can ask themselves this question: \u201cI\u2019m a server of food and a putter-on of pants and a bed-maker, somebody who can be called on when you want something. But who am I?\u201d<\/span>\n\n

Tumhari Sulu<\/em> refreshingly gives us a glimpse into Sulu\u2019s afternoons, where she is in the kitchen prepping for dinner while listening to her favourite radio channel or unknowingly ending up taking a harmless nap.<\/p><\/blockquote> \n\nIn Sulu and Shashi’s case, the mere thought of this question is an act of rebellion unlike Sandhya’s life (Bhumi Pednekar) in <\/span>Dum Laga Ke Haisha<\/span><\/i>. Sandhya has the option of not drowning herself in household duties, and doesn\u2019t have to <\/span>earn<\/span><\/i> her financial independence. Sulu and Shashi are older, they have grown up amid a mindset that shied away from a reality where married women could be equals with their husbands, go out to work, and earn the same salary as them. For Shashi, an oft-trivialised act of learning to speak <\/span>English<\/span><\/a> is ambitious enough. Similarly, for my 50-something-mother, who has lived the last two decades of her life attending to every detail in my sister\u2019s, father\u2019s, and my lives, the freedom to join a singing class is enough. <\/span>\n\nShashi and my mother\u2019s belief that they are <\/span>only <\/span><\/i>meant to seek fulfillment from their domesticated lives lulled them into a social reality where being a homemaker defined their identity. Prioritising doing things for themselves doesn\u2019t come as naturally to them as it does to their offsprings. They weren\u2019t content with their lives, but they were also not aware that it wasn\u2019t okay to live that way. Which is why even Sulu\u2019s ambitions start small. First it\u2019s wanting to be a cab driver and owning a car business, which then transforms into her desire of being a gym instructor, finally culminating into her calling of becoming a radio jockey.<\/span>\n\n\"Tumhari\n

\n

Times have changed, but has the language of loneliness changed for the homemaker?<\/p>\n

T-Series\/Ellipsis Entertainment<\/p>\n<\/figcaption>\n<\/figure>\n\nIn a heart-rending essay titled, <\/span>\u201cThe Captivity Of Marriage\u201d<\/span><\/a> published in The Atlantic in 1961, novelist Noah Johnson, a happily married, mother of two, termed this existentially isolated, restless feeling as the \u201chousewife syndrome\u201d, defining it as \u201cthe<\/span> vicious circle, the feeling of emptiness in the gap between what she thought marriage was going to be like and what it is really like\u201d. Her essay further articulated how \u201cwives are lonelier now than they ever used to be\u201d.<\/span>\n\nIt\u2019s been more than 50 years since her essay. Times have changed, but has the language of loneliness changed for the homemaker? Has the search for their independence lessened their isolation, or are they lonelier now than they ever used to be? <\/span>\n\nMaybe the answer will keep changing from generation to generation until there (hopefully) comes a generation that isn\u2019t left grappling with the \u201chousewife syndrome\u201d anymore. Until then, we have the small victories of Bollywood\u2019s \u201caam aurat\u201d characters like Sulu and Shashi to give us hope, and make every homemaker believe in the Sulu-ism: \u201cMain bhi kar sakti hai.\u201d<\/span>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The solitary afternoon of the homemaker is a deeply interesting space. And that is what Vidya Balan\u2019s Tumhari Sulu delves into. It\u2019s the only time of the day most housewives acknowledge the loneliness they harbour.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":103,"featured_media":1625,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[82],"tags":[2164,3004,1100,1860,19,1787,3005,2027,3006,1955,3007,3008,3009,154],"class_list":["post-1621","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-pop-culture","tag-bhumi-pednekar","tag-dum-laga-ke-haisha","tag-english-vinglish","tag-housewives","tag-india","tag-irrfan-khan","tag-manav-kaul","tag-movie-review","tag-nimrat-kaur","tag-sridevi","tag-suresh-triveni","tag-tumhari-sulu","tag-tumhari-sulu-review","tag-vidya-balan"],"yoast_head":"\nTumhari Sulu and the Real Housewives of India<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The solitary afternoon of the homemaker is a deeply interesting space. 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