{"id":1174,"date":"2016-05-18T05:24:52","date_gmt":"2016-05-18T05:24:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=1174"},"modified":"2026-07-17T14:00:39","modified_gmt":"2026-07-17T14:00:39","slug":"flirting-love-sex-tinder-dating-relationships-india","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/13.207.105.184\/?p=1174","title":{"rendered":"Flirting 101: How to Lose a Girl in 1 Minute"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><span class=\"dropcap\">&#8220;G<\/span>oing to Big Bazaar, want me to pick up anything?\u201d\n\nMy phone screen buzzed, brightening up an otherwise dreary Friday night. Something about that line seemed familiar.\n\nIt didn\u2019t take me long to figure out the source. <\/p><em>Master of None<\/em>. First Date. In the brilliant fourth episode from the show\u2019s second season, Aziz Ansari was forced to navigate the tricky swipe-istan of dating apps. To stand out amid the hordes of love-hungry bros hopelessly fighting for a single woman\u2019s uninterrupted interest, Ansari\u2019s Dev came up with a unique opening line: \u201cGoing to Whole Foods, want me to pick up anything?\u201d\n\nI\u2019d<a href=\"https:\/\/www.theverge.com\/2017\/5\/24\/15683388\/master-of-none-going-to-whole-foods-line-tinder\"> read<\/a> about Ansari\u2019s opening line swiftly percolating down to real-life screens of the app-dating jungle. Now, confronted with an Indianised version from a dude I matched with two days back, my interest piqued. The next day, I wasted no time in steering our conversation toward his opening parley.\n\nBut I should have known better than setting up my expectations. When have great flirtatious opening lines ever followed through on their promise?\n\nMy dreams of having a heady discussion about our shared love for <em>Master of None<\/em> fell flat on my face the moment he opened his mouth. As it turned out, my date had probably just Googled \u201cbest pick-up lines for Tinder\u201d and didn\u2019t give a hoot about the show. After all \u2013 and he told me this with great confidence \u2013 didn\u2019t women want men to flirt with them using templates from movies and TV shows, anyway?\n\nI swapped the story with a girlfriend a few days later, and she told me about the time she met a male version of Kate Hudson from <em>How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days<\/em>. Just the way Kate Hudson leaves her purse with tickets to a Knicks game at Matthew McConaughey\u2019s house on purpose, her date left his wallet. The wallet was packed with notes waxing eloquent on her beauty. Among these lay a note whose contents were intended to transform her into a puddle of melting goodness, except\u2026 it had the exact opposite effect. \u201cMere dil, jigar, liver mein ho tum\u2026 waqt bewaqt aaye woh fever ho tum\u2026 ab toh meri life mein forever ho tum,\u201d it said. Even as my friend rolled her eyes at the desperately filmy tactic, came the last straw in a text from him. It contained the two words neither a single girl nor Pahlaj Nihalani wants to hear: \u201cSend Nudes\u201d.\n<blockquote class=\"quote--center\">Maybe the problem lies in the fact that for most Indian men, flirting is merely a precursor to sex \u2013 a formality, just like foreplay that needs to be dispensed with hurriedly.<\/blockquote>\nI\u2019ve often wondered whether people the world over are hopeless at flirting, or whether this is a special affliction that we, in the subcontinent, suffer from. Unfortunately, the way our societal networks are structured, an unfair part of the burden of initiating a relationship or a casual dalliance through harmless flirting, falls on the men. Who fail at it quite spectacularly \u2013 not with a bang, but a whimper.\n\nUrban Dictionary defines<a href=\"http:\/\/www.urbandictionary.com\/define.php?term=flirting\"> flirting<\/a> as \u201cyou dinking around with the opposite sex\u201d, but for clueless Indian bros, the definition seemingly transcends to \u201cblock-worthy behaviour that will elicit at least five eye-rolls\u201d. For Indian men uncoached in the art of flirting, recreating moves from the pop culture that they consume appears to be the only option. Growing up on a steady diet of their mother\u2019s validation, a fairly warped understanding of the opposite sex, and stilted interactions with them have ensured that our men know as much about flirting as Donald Trump knows about running a country. And then there is Bollywood that has been peddling a narrative where men get away with cringey lines: \u201cKya aap believe karte hai love at first sight mein&#8230; ya main dobaara ghoom ke aau?\u201d\n\n<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-23192\" src=\"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/1500035946.gif\" alt=\"Flirting\" width=\"480\" height=\"224\" \/>\n<figcaption>\n<p>GIF \/ EROS<\/p>\n<\/figcaption>\n<\/figure>\n\nAs a result, we\u2019re left with dudes who classify sitting through the length of an entire date without consciously making eye contact with the girl, as flirting. Or bros who think it involves relentless winking. Or those who randomly slip in risqu\u00e9 sexual innuendos mid-conversation and take their date\u2019s awkward response as a green signal. Or the dudebros, in whose imagination flirting is akin to the way Akash Ambani probably says Hello, i.e., rattling off the details of his father\u2019s numerous bank accounts.\n\nRecently, a<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/TheRestlessQuil\/status\/874200117993066496\"> Twitter thread<\/a> that asked men how they determined that a woman was interested in or flirting with them garnered downright scary, hilarious and, heartbreakingly sad responses. One terrified guy\u2019s strategy was to \u201cplay dumb and wait until she got fed up and kissed me\u201d; while another was of the unwavering belief that asking out a colleague for lunch in the office cafeteria sealed the deal. Yet another fell back on the \u201chasee toh phasee\u201d stratagem of cracking bad jokes.\n\nMost saddening and alarming of all, the thread also illuminated that most men misinterpreted general friendliness for flirtation. One responder said that he could \u201csense\u201d that a woman was interested if she kept moving the objects between them during a conversation, while another was certain that a woman \u201cfeigning interest\u201d in his hobbies was a clear giveaway. But, the best telltale sign is succinctly summed up in a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.quora.com\/How-can-you-determine-if-an-Indian-girl-is-flirting-with-you\">Quora<\/a> thread, which advised men that until a woman addressed them as \u201cbhaiyya\u201d, anything she did could be considered flirting, such as breathing or existing in a man\u2019s vicinity.\n\nMaybe the problem lies in the fact that for most Indian men, flirting is merely a precursor to sex \u2013 a formality, just like foreplay that needs to be dispensed with hurriedly. For India\u2019s straight women, this comes with massive baggage, and the need to self-filter every conversation, every touch, and action in our heads. It also renders what\u2019s essentially a pit stop between thirst and love, a joyless exercise for both the parties. Between the blushing and the racing hearts, a satisfying round of to-and-fro can set the mood more effectively than any number of candlelight dinners.\n\nNumerous dates and stories later, all I\u2019m asking for is a guy to not treat the art of flirting the same way Donald Trump responds to global warming. No one likes getting court-side seats to a Roger Federer match\u2026 only to watch Arbaaz Khan, instead.\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Urban Dictionary defines flirting as \u201cyou dinking around with the opposite sex\u201d, but for clueless Indian bros, the definition seemingly transcends to \u201cblock-worthy behaviour that will elicit at least five eye-rolls\u201d.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":103,"featured_media":1177,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[1975,1976,505,1047,1977,1978,1979,1980,1981,224,1982,1983,1984,1985,408,1051],"class_list":["post-1174","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-love-and-sex","tag-aziz-ansari","tag-cocktail","tag-dating","tag-dating-apps","tag-flirting","tag-flirting-101","tag-how-to-lose-a-girl","tag-indian-men","tag-indian-relationships","tag-love","tag-love-and-sex","tag-master-of-none","tag-mujhse-fraandship-karoge","tag-saif-ali-khan-pick-up-lines","tag-sex","tag-tinder"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Flirting 101: How to Lose a Girl in 1 Minute<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Urban Dictionary defines flirting as \u201cyou dinking around with the opposite sex\u201d, but for clueless Indian bros, the definition seemingly transcends to \u201cblock-worthy behaviour that will elicit at least five eye-rolls\u201d.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/?p=1174\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Flirting 101: How to Lose a Girl in 1 Minute\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Urban Dictionary defines flirting as \u201cyou dinking around with the opposite sex\u201d, but for clueless Indian bros, the definition seemingly transcends to \u201cblock-worthy behaviour that will elicit at least five eye-rolls\u201d.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/?p=1174\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Arr\u00e9\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2016-05-18T05:24:52+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-07-17T14:00:39+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/1500034089.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"860\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"500\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Poulomi Das\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"Flirting 101: How to Lose a Girl in 1 Minute\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:description\" content=\"Urban Dictionary defines flirting as \u201cyou dinking around with the opposite sex\u201d, but for clueless Indian bros, the definition seemingly transcends to \u201cblock-worthy behaviour that will elicit at least five eye-rolls\u201d.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Poulomi Das\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.arre.co.in\\\/?p=1174#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.arre.co.in\\\/?p=1174\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Poulomi Das\",\"@id\":\"http:\\\/\\\/13.201.39.237\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7cc6b159b4669ddf75eae5f2b536d679\"},\"headline\":\"Flirting 101: How to Lose a Girl in 1 Minute\",\"datePublished\":\"2016-05-18T05:24:52+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-07-17T14:00:39+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.arre.co.in\\\/?p=1174\"},\"wordCount\":1066,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.arre.co.in\\\/?p=1174#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\\\/\\\/13.207.105.184\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/07\\\/1500034089.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"aziz ansari\",\"Cocktail\",\"dating\",\"Dating apps\",\"Flirting\",\"Flirting 101\",\"How to Lose a Girl\",\"indian men\",\"Indian Relationships\",\"love\",\"Love and Sex\",\"Master of None\",\"Mujhse Fraandship Karoge\",\"Saif Ali Khan. 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